Well this year I've officially sucked at blogging. Perhaps the years got a bit away with me. So next year, I really am going to make a concerted effort at blogging more.
...honestly x
Tuesday, December 25
Monday, November 5
Long Time No Blog :D
...but not as long as you would have liked I imagine :p
"It's the most wonderful time of the year" lalala...yes it's true I'm still in a sickly joyous mood at the moment...well it's November 5th what do you expect!
It's been a busy old week to be fair, old friends reuniting after 25 years, jobs ending, jobs beginning, A&E, plastic surgery Halloween, A limestone Soldier, Bonfire Night & Birthdays galore...not quite the usual (unless you live in Weatherfield).
I'll concentrate on the reunion as this will take a while, you'll have to wait for my next installment to find out about the rest! :D...I know I'm cruel like that.
As usual it all started with me geeking around on the "tinterweb" in a bleak attempt to add a bit of excitement into my otherwise very mundane afternoon. I had decided to update my Friends Reunited profile?!...think I was spurred on by a report on the news that they were trying to save my Old School building from being demolished after a fire as Stan Laurel used to board there as a lad & rightly so! I have allot of fond memories of that part of school...mainly of the boys in class lighting the gas taps :s....I'm going off on a tangent.
As I was saying after updating my ...very...very boring profile I had a scan around...after exhausting the search functions trying to locate my Friends from yest er year I decided to have a look on behalf of my mum. At this point you need a little background information on my mum, aged 16 my mum decided to move to South Africa with a friend (yes you know where I get it from now) anyway very long story short...they had a fallout & my mum ended up moving from Sassleburg(Transvaal) in the Orange Free State to North Cliff just outside Jo Burg. Here she lived in an apartment with about six other people (mainly students)...when I was younger she would always tell me about how wonderful her friends were & how she wished she'd kept in touch with them.
Me being me, I decided to do a search on a few of the main names I could remember from her tales...& lo & behold I found one of them!...without giving it a thought I sent a message which read something along the lines of "Hi, you wont know me but I believe you may know my mum..." I obviously added a few facts & dates to jog his memory...otherwise it would have been quite a random email indeed.
Later that day when my mum arrived home I told her all about the old friend I may have found & she couldn't believe it...but ever the pessimist she didn't want to get too excited saying "oh it wont be the right person" & "I doubt they would want to talk to me after all this time".
The very next day I received an email saying that "J" (mum's old friend) had replied to my message...my mum was panicking so much as I logged into the site to see what his reply was. I wish you could have seen her face as she read the email confirming that it was indeed the friend she had been looking for all those years, he seemed just as shocked & excited as my mum as he explained a little about himself & what he was up to now...we were shocked to find that he was now living in the UK with his wife & children & was extremely eager to find out what my mum had been doing all these years.
After many lengthy emails to & fro trying their hardest to summarise the last twenty five years of their lives (wow I've not even been alive that long!) marriage, children etc..they exchanged numbers and tonight "J"called!...my dad & I sat listened intently as my mum & "J" talked about the "good old days" in Jo Burg...why he & his family had to flee South Africa..where all the other house mates were now, you could make a movie out of it no lie!
Just before "J" went he asked if he could speak to me...with a puzzled expression I took the receiver from my mum, on saying "hello?!" I was greeted with a soft Afrikaans voice full of praise & thanks for making it all happen...I didn't know what to say...I didn't feel like I had done that much...I'd merely clicked a few buttons & got the ball rolling that's all...but the gratitude continued...I never realised what a difference I was going to make, I'm so pleased I was able to do this for them...it's true when people say you feel so much better when you do something for others.
All of our family's are now hoping to have a gathering sometime in the near future which will be great...I'll be sure to let you know how it all goes & hopefully post some pictures up here for you all to see :).
Anyway...I should go to bed now as it's after midnight...again! :p
Ciao!!
"It's the most wonderful time of the year" lalala...yes it's true I'm still in a sickly joyous mood at the moment...well it's November 5th what do you expect!
It's been a busy old week to be fair, old friends reuniting after 25 years, jobs ending, jobs beginning, A&E, plastic surgery Halloween, A limestone Soldier, Bonfire Night & Birthdays galore...not quite the usual (unless you live in Weatherfield).
I'll concentrate on the reunion as this will take a while, you'll have to wait for my next installment to find out about the rest! :D...I know I'm cruel like that.
As usual it all started with me geeking around on the "tinterweb" in a bleak attempt to add a bit of excitement into my otherwise very mundane afternoon. I had decided to update my Friends Reunited profile?!...think I was spurred on by a report on the news that they were trying to save my Old School building from being demolished after a fire as Stan Laurel used to board there as a lad & rightly so! I have allot of fond memories of that part of school...mainly of the boys in class lighting the gas taps :s....I'm going off on a tangent.
As I was saying after updating my ...very...very boring profile I had a scan around...after exhausting the search functions trying to locate my Friends from yest er year I decided to have a look on behalf of my mum. At this point you need a little background information on my mum, aged 16 my mum decided to move to South Africa with a friend (yes you know where I get it from now) anyway very long story short...they had a fallout & my mum ended up moving from Sassleburg(Transvaal) in the Orange Free State to North Cliff just outside Jo Burg. Here she lived in an apartment with about six other people (mainly students)...when I was younger she would always tell me about how wonderful her friends were & how she wished she'd kept in touch with them.
Me being me, I decided to do a search on a few of the main names I could remember from her tales...& lo & behold I found one of them!...without giving it a thought I sent a message which read something along the lines of "Hi, you wont know me but I believe you may know my mum..." I obviously added a few facts & dates to jog his memory...otherwise it would have been quite a random email indeed.
Later that day when my mum arrived home I told her all about the old friend I may have found & she couldn't believe it...but ever the pessimist she didn't want to get too excited saying "oh it wont be the right person" & "I doubt they would want to talk to me after all this time".
The very next day I received an email saying that "J" (mum's old friend) had replied to my message...my mum was panicking so much as I logged into the site to see what his reply was. I wish you could have seen her face as she read the email confirming that it was indeed the friend she had been looking for all those years, he seemed just as shocked & excited as my mum as he explained a little about himself & what he was up to now...we were shocked to find that he was now living in the UK with his wife & children & was extremely eager to find out what my mum had been doing all these years.
After many lengthy emails to & fro trying their hardest to summarise the last twenty five years of their lives (wow I've not even been alive that long!) marriage, children etc..they exchanged numbers and tonight "J"called!...my dad & I sat listened intently as my mum & "J" talked about the "good old days" in Jo Burg...why he & his family had to flee South Africa..where all the other house mates were now, you could make a movie out of it no lie!
Just before "J" went he asked if he could speak to me...with a puzzled expression I took the receiver from my mum, on saying "hello?!" I was greeted with a soft Afrikaans voice full of praise & thanks for making it all happen...I didn't know what to say...I didn't feel like I had done that much...I'd merely clicked a few buttons & got the ball rolling that's all...but the gratitude continued...I never realised what a difference I was going to make, I'm so pleased I was able to do this for them...it's true when people say you feel so much better when you do something for others.
All of our family's are now hoping to have a gathering sometime in the near future which will be great...I'll be sure to let you know how it all goes & hopefully post some pictures up here for you all to see :).
Anyway...I should go to bed now as it's after midnight...again! :p
Ciao!!
The perfect words never crossed my mind because there was nothing in there but
you...
Thursday, October 25
Snow is falling..
...well not just yet...but it's blumin' freezing outside today! *burr*
60 shopping days left until Christmas...wow I love this time of year :))
Well you'll be pleased to learn that since my last post I've found a job...yes you heard right someone has actually employed me...I'm so relieved!...no before you comment I'm not going to be a "Happy Little Elf" in the Metro Centre thank you...although I do have a penchant for green :p...I am actually the newest member of the team in my local Pharmaceuticals store.
Don't start until November 5th though (My favourite day of the year may I add)...I don't know why but I love the dark nights, crisp clean air & the excuse to wrap up warm & huddle around a bonfire with all my friends...it's a magic time of year I feel :)
I am however (you can sense a rant coming on cant you :p) slightly annoyed to find that the officials in my town have arranged our firework display for November 1st???...why would they do this...have they not heard the rhyme "remember remember the 5th of November"...the whole point of the night is to remember the night when Guy Fawkes almost blew up the houses of Parliament...which was certainly not November 1st...they'll be re-arranging Christmas next! hmpf (rant over) :D
Well that's my little lot for the moment...I'm off to mitten shop now!!
60 shopping days left until Christmas...wow I love this time of year :))
Well you'll be pleased to learn that since my last post I've found a job...yes you heard right someone has actually employed me...I'm so relieved!...no before you comment I'm not going to be a "Happy Little Elf" in the Metro Centre thank you...although I do have a penchant for green :p...I am actually the newest member of the team in my local Pharmaceuticals store.
Don't start until November 5th though (My favourite day of the year may I add)...I don't know why but I love the dark nights, crisp clean air & the excuse to wrap up warm & huddle around a bonfire with all my friends...it's a magic time of year I feel :)
I am however (you can sense a rant coming on cant you :p) slightly annoyed to find that the officials in my town have arranged our firework display for November 1st???...why would they do this...have they not heard the rhyme "remember remember the 5th of November"...the whole point of the night is to remember the night when Guy Fawkes almost blew up the houses of Parliament...which was certainly not November 1st...they'll be re-arranging Christmas next! hmpf (rant over) :D
Well that's my little lot for the moment...I'm off to mitten shop now!!
Snow is falling, all around me. Children playing, having fun. Tis the
season for love and understanding...
Wednesday, October 24
Solar cells you can paint?!
OK so I heard about this a while back & it really interested me...with being a big geek & all!
Researchers at New Jersey Institute of Technology claim they've created a solar cell which is cheap and can be painted or printed on flexible plastic sheets. According to Somenath Mitra, professor of the Institutes department of chemistry and environmental sciences the process is so simple that eventually it will be possible to print sheets of solar cells with inexpensive home-based ink jet printers.
"Consumers can then slap the finished product on a wall, roof or billboard to create their own power stations."Apparently the Nanotechnology used is far more efficient at harnessing the suns energy than the regular solar cells we use today.
Imagine some day driving in your hybrid car with a solar panel painted on the roof, which is producing electricity to drive the engine. Kitchen appliances can also be painted with the stuff so they can power themselves...mobile phones...mp3 players! the opportunities are endless!
I'm getting a bit carried away with this now so I'll stop there :p
Monday, October 22
Toon Treble Sinks Spurs!
I shouldn't really be boasting about what in all honesty was a shockingly bad performance from the Geordie's...but luckily for us Spurs were even worse on the night, handing us a much needed & appreciated three points *thanks lads* oh & the goals from Martins, Cacapa (1st goal in Black & White may I add) & Milner helped maintain our UNBEATEN** home campaign!
This places us comfortably behind Chelsea now in 8th place...but with a game still in hand...we've still got a chance of climbing a little higher in the table...haven't we?!?
...bring on Reading! :D
Random Fact *Newcastle have scored more Premier League goals
against Tottenham than any other club...46 to be exact!*...thought you'd like to know (well you will if your a daft Mag like me!).
This places us comfortably behind Chelsea now in 8th place...but with a game still in hand...we've still got a chance of climbing a little higher in the table...haven't we?!?
...bring on Reading! :D
OCD?!?
House has been cleaned top to bottom...dinner made...dishes washed...Cooker/Oven de-greased...re-arranged cutlery drawer...*argh* I so need a job!!!
Friday, October 19
I should be working :s
Sunday night...I should be at work but have had a killer migraine for the last couple of day's *woe me*...it's starting to ease now so I shan't dwell on that!
This week...hmm had a bit of an odd one really, still no word on a job *sigh* but I'll carry on looking tomorrow...even if I return to the dizzy heights of the mighty ASDA it's better than having nothing better to do than geek around on here all day...kinda (as if I do that :|).
erm what else...not allot else...worked in the bar...& got chased by the worlds largest spider (OK maybe not the largest) but it terrified the living daylights out of me I can tell you...much to the amusement of the customers may I add...slightly embarrassing :p
...My mind has gone totally blank :s...may be to do with my eight year old brother practising his wrestling moves behind me :p...oh well I shall add more when I can think!
...now I'm off to watch Dirty Dancing :D what a quality slice of cheese!!
Great stuff!
This week...hmm had a bit of an odd one really, still no word on a job *sigh* but I'll carry on looking tomorrow...even if I return to the dizzy heights of the mighty ASDA it's better than having nothing better to do than geek around on here all day...kinda (as if I do that :|).
erm what else...not allot else...worked in the bar...& got chased by the worlds largest spider (OK maybe not the largest) but it terrified the living daylights out of me I can tell you...much to the amusement of the customers may I add...slightly embarrassing :p
...My mind has gone totally blank :s...may be to do with my eight year old brother practising his wrestling moves behind me :p...oh well I shall add more when I can think!
...now I'm off to watch Dirty Dancing :D what a quality slice of cheese!!
...I've had the time of my life...& I owe it all to you!...
Great stuff!
Tuesday, October 16
A positive outlook...
Well you will be quite happy to learn that I awoke in a very chirpy mood this morning...not sure why...maybe it's because there are only 69 day's left until Christmas...or that I was greeted with the tale of the village "degenerate drug user" who was last night arrested as she was caught with her fingers in the till of the local store...who knows :)
After my slightly down beat post yesterday...I did quite allot of thinking, maybe I just try to rush everything...I mean just because things aren't how I planned at the moment it doesn't mean that it wont all work out for the better in the future does it?!...I shall be more patient from now on, who knows Mr Right may be just round the corner :o)
Note to self: Stay positive...things could be much worse
That is all :)....enjoy your day!!
After my slightly down beat post yesterday...I did quite allot of thinking, maybe I just try to rush everything...I mean just because things aren't how I planned at the moment it doesn't mean that it wont all work out for the better in the future does it?!...I shall be more patient from now on, who knows Mr Right may be just round the corner :o)
Note to self: Stay positive...things could be much worse
That is all :)....enjoy your day!!
...I find it easier to sit and stare, than push my limbs out towards you right there. My heart is bursting in your perfect eyes, as blue as oceans and as pure as skies...
Monday, October 15
Wake up will you!
When you finally wake up to what others have seen all along it can only be best described as one of those Eureka! moments....only sadly lacking the joy & enthusiasm.
At what point did this happen...when did I become so blinkered that I couldn't see what was happening around me?!...god I hate being a pessimist but I do feel like I've been taken for a mug recently.
I'll try to shed some light on my ramblings for you: -
So this guy...who I kinda liked...but shouldn't have..but told him I did anyway, well it's pretty much confirmed now that he's far from over his ex *sigh*...It annoys me so much that I've only just realised this...even after he didn't always reply to texts or emails...makes plans & cancels...I mean last week he stood me up without an explanation or an apology & just acted like nothing had happened. The worst thing is I know this is totally my fault & not his as much as I'd love to lay the blame on someone else. I think I've waited for so long for someone to come along that I didn't really stop to check if the feeling was mutual just started carrying on like a doe eyed school girl embarrassingly...well I know now which is the main thing, hopefully I'll learn from this.
Well I'd like to say that the week's going to take a more positive turn after my little revelation today but unfortunately that's not the case...I'm currently sitting by the phone "still" waiting for a call about a job...I really hate being unemployed...well (as far as the tax man is concerned I am :s) even though this is only my third day!...then there's the fact that my mum's stopped smoking...I'm so pleased that she finally feels ready to kick the habit...but dear god...the mood swings! the government should set up support groups for families dealing with quitters...it's terrible...you spend the entire day walking on egg shells & for what?! to be told that you are useless & never do anything to help...& then get laid with the guilt that if they start smoking again it will be your fault!!..if I didn't care about her health so much I go buy her 20 Regals...but I shall persevere...(currently my mums telling me she feels like burning everything that's out of place) *I repeatedly tell myself* it's all for the best :s
I know what your thinking...I'm over reacting I should just get out of the house for a bit...all fair & good but this is where the next problem Lie's, when I want to clear my head...or just generally don't want to be disturbed I go to the gym...my trips have been getting allot more frequent of late. Great you may say but it's worrying to me...I used to be a bit of an obsessive in this area a few years back you see & wound up fairly unhealthy as a result..an awful mix of stress & low self esteem drove me to a disgraceful size 4 (or zero) if you've been reading about the disgusting trend in the tabloids recently. My family were so supportive & managed to pull me out of the destructive cycle before it was too late & I did serious damage to my health. I'm a different person all together now to what I was then but unsurprisingly still fear going down that road again so I've been trying to limit my gym sessions lately.
This hasn't left me with a great deal else to do...I don't drive which significantly limits where I can go & who I can see, my best friend Jo is tied up with Wedding plans so I'm lucky if I get to see her once a week and Gaynor, she's such a sweetie but think she gets bored discussing...news/work & many other topics & would rather hit the town which is something I've been enjoying less & less recently (I'm turning into such an old woman). The only real thing I have planned for this week is to spend Friday with Rachel I wish I could say I was looking forward to this... she's one of my closest friends but has had more dramas in her 28years than many people would ever wish to have in their entire lives. Friday we shall spend visiting her little girls grave...I do this every anniversary with her, it's very upsetting & I never know what to say....what can you really?...all I know is that it some how helps her having me there...so I go, as any good friend would do to support their Friend when they need it most & here I am writing about how bad I've got it.
I hope I have some nicer news to write about next time.
Coldplay – Fix You
At what point did this happen...when did I become so blinkered that I couldn't see what was happening around me?!...god I hate being a pessimist but I do feel like I've been taken for a mug recently.
I'll try to shed some light on my ramblings for you: -
So this guy...who I kinda liked...but shouldn't have..but told him I did anyway, well it's pretty much confirmed now that he's far from over his ex *sigh*...It annoys me so much that I've only just realised this...even after he didn't always reply to texts or emails...makes plans & cancels...I mean last week he stood me up without an explanation or an apology & just acted like nothing had happened. The worst thing is I know this is totally my fault & not his as much as I'd love to lay the blame on someone else. I think I've waited for so long for someone to come along that I didn't really stop to check if the feeling was mutual just started carrying on like a doe eyed school girl embarrassingly...well I know now which is the main thing, hopefully I'll learn from this.
Well I'd like to say that the week's going to take a more positive turn after my little revelation today but unfortunately that's not the case...I'm currently sitting by the phone "still" waiting for a call about a job...I really hate being unemployed...well (as far as the tax man is concerned I am :s) even though this is only my third day!...then there's the fact that my mum's stopped smoking...I'm so pleased that she finally feels ready to kick the habit...but dear god...the mood swings! the government should set up support groups for families dealing with quitters...it's terrible...you spend the entire day walking on egg shells & for what?! to be told that you are useless & never do anything to help...& then get laid with the guilt that if they start smoking again it will be your fault!!..if I didn't care about her health so much I go buy her 20 Regals...but I shall persevere...(currently my mums telling me she feels like burning everything that's out of place) *I repeatedly tell myself* it's all for the best :s
I know what your thinking...I'm over reacting I should just get out of the house for a bit...all fair & good but this is where the next problem Lie's, when I want to clear my head...or just generally don't want to be disturbed I go to the gym...my trips have been getting allot more frequent of late. Great you may say but it's worrying to me...I used to be a bit of an obsessive in this area a few years back you see & wound up fairly unhealthy as a result..an awful mix of stress & low self esteem drove me to a disgraceful size 4 (or zero) if you've been reading about the disgusting trend in the tabloids recently. My family were so supportive & managed to pull me out of the destructive cycle before it was too late & I did serious damage to my health. I'm a different person all together now to what I was then but unsurprisingly still fear going down that road again so I've been trying to limit my gym sessions lately.
This hasn't left me with a great deal else to do...I don't drive which significantly limits where I can go & who I can see, my best friend Jo is tied up with Wedding plans so I'm lucky if I get to see her once a week and Gaynor, she's such a sweetie but think she gets bored discussing...news/work & many other topics & would rather hit the town which is something I've been enjoying less & less recently (I'm turning into such an old woman). The only real thing I have planned for this week is to spend Friday with Rachel I wish I could say I was looking forward to this... she's one of my closest friends but has had more dramas in her 28years than many people would ever wish to have in their entire lives. Friday we shall spend visiting her little girls grave...I do this every anniversary with her, it's very upsetting & I never know what to say....what can you really?...all I know is that it some how helps her having me there...so I go, as any good friend would do to support their Friend when they need it most & here I am writing about how bad I've got it.
I hope I have some nicer news to write about next time.
Coldplay – Fix You
Sunday, October 14
Life at the moment
Ok ok so I've been meaning to do this for a while...a long while in fact, I just never seem to get round to it. I was talking to my best friend Jo...over a bottle of wine, in some fine "two for one" eating establishment recently about...well my life in general & the drama's I seem to keep having & she suggested I write about it. No idea why but apparently she finds my ramblings entertaining?! so...*ahem* in my best Keenan & Kel style voice (oh dear God)...Aw, here it goes!
Right so I've had allot on my mind recently..an unhealthy amount you might say, especially for someone who is prone to over thinking and analysing things as much as I am.
Firstly there's "the move" ah yes the the most favoured topic of conversation in my house...& has been for the past few years as I recall. Basically my parents are wanting to emigrate to NZ...which is great, but they need to sell this house before they can go...which is the problem. I've had countless arguments with my Step dad over the price...I think he's got it on the market for too much & that's why we've been up for sale since November! without an offer...frustratingly he's holding out for the asking price...which inevitably will never come *sigh*
And to add to the drama of "the move" I decided...after spending a few months in NZ earlier this year that I don't want to move there permanently at this present time...my mum is not pleased with me about this to say the least & has chosen (annoyingly) to pretend like I've said nothing...& still tells everyone I'm still going *grrr* (why don't people take me seriously!!).
Then there's work...this I don't even want to talk about at the moment, I was working then I wasn't...then I was working again, then I wasn't...then I thought I had a stable job...& last week found out I didn't anymore :'( WHY?? please someone tell me am I that hard to employ...what is it?...that fact that I turn up on time (I know employers hate that)...or that I get on with my colleagues...or maybe that I finish set tasks?...I'm fairly frustrated as you may be able to tell *hmph*
I'm so confused right now where to go work wise, I've even been contemplating joining the Army...seriously, I've had interviews and everything...just need to sit my BARB now to check that I can get into my chosen Corps...but I've been putting this off, I think it's the "four year minimum service" that's worrying me...I've been told it will take about five month's from applying until I actually start training which mean's I'll be 23 add four year's reconable service to that & I'll be over 27 by the time I'm allowed out...(you can see my over thinking coming into play cant you) it's just a daunting prospect & something I want to give allot more thought to before making my final decision.
Men. ah the elusive "perfect guy"...we've all got our ideal's...but I don't think I'm asking for too much, am I?...I'll let you decide. I just want someone who gets me...who knows I'm sarcastic & doesn't take offence at every little thing I say, someone who wants to spend time with me, who doesn't hide me from their friends (or stop me seeing mine) who just enjoys the same types of things I do really.
I always have problem's in this area...I met a guy...he was nice for a while, a long while in fact...we went on holidays...spent many Christmas/Birthday's together, almost bought a house...we were even getting engaged...then I woke up to the fact he's some needy mummy's boy who loved to put me down..."fat, ugly, no friend's" a few pleasant comments he regularly made...& let's not forget the time's I was glassed/jumped/almost arrested & generally humiliated for his amusement...thanks for the last few year's Mr.
Needless to say I've steered clear of relationships since, I've met some nice guy's over the past year or so who I'm sure had genuinely good intentions towards me but I've always pushed them away, it's only been very recently that I've even contemplated the whole "dating" thing...& to be honest I'm terrified at the thought!...I met a guy who I kinda like...ok I like, I've known him for a little while now so thought..."just be honest"...so I was *argh* I'm so not sure if it was the right thing to do see he's just got out of a relationship, but they'd been on/off for a while, so if it's another of those situations & they get back together I'll feel a tad stupid...oh well it's done now *gulp*
So anyway that's my lot for tonight...please excuse all grammatical errors...I'm more of a talker than a writer :p
Snow Patrol – Chocolate
Right so I've had allot on my mind recently..an unhealthy amount you might say, especially for someone who is prone to over thinking and analysing things as much as I am.
Firstly there's "the move" ah yes the the most favoured topic of conversation in my house...& has been for the past few years as I recall. Basically my parents are wanting to emigrate to NZ...which is great, but they need to sell this house before they can go...which is the problem. I've had countless arguments with my Step dad over the price...I think he's got it on the market for too much & that's why we've been up for sale since November! without an offer...frustratingly he's holding out for the asking price...which inevitably will never come *sigh*
And to add to the drama of "the move" I decided...after spending a few months in NZ earlier this year that I don't want to move there permanently at this present time...my mum is not pleased with me about this to say the least & has chosen (annoyingly) to pretend like I've said nothing...& still tells everyone I'm still going *grrr* (why don't people take me seriously!!).
Then there's work...this I don't even want to talk about at the moment, I was working then I wasn't...then I was working again, then I wasn't...then I thought I had a stable job...& last week found out I didn't anymore :'( WHY?? please someone tell me am I that hard to employ...what is it?...that fact that I turn up on time (I know employers hate that)...or that I get on with my colleagues...or maybe that I finish set tasks?...I'm fairly frustrated as you may be able to tell *hmph*
I'm so confused right now where to go work wise, I've even been contemplating joining the Army...seriously, I've had interviews and everything...just need to sit my BARB now to check that I can get into my chosen Corps...but I've been putting this off, I think it's the "four year minimum service" that's worrying me...I've been told it will take about five month's from applying until I actually start training which mean's I'll be 23 add four year's reconable service to that & I'll be over 27 by the time I'm allowed out...(you can see my over thinking coming into play cant you) it's just a daunting prospect & something I want to give allot more thought to before making my final decision.
Men. ah the elusive "perfect guy"...we've all got our ideal's...but I don't think I'm asking for too much, am I?...I'll let you decide. I just want someone who gets me...who knows I'm sarcastic & doesn't take offence at every little thing I say, someone who wants to spend time with me, who doesn't hide me from their friends (or stop me seeing mine) who just enjoys the same types of things I do really.
I always have problem's in this area...I met a guy...he was nice for a while, a long while in fact...we went on holidays...spent many Christmas/Birthday's together, almost bought a house...we were even getting engaged...then I woke up to the fact he's some needy mummy's boy who loved to put me down..."fat, ugly, no friend's" a few pleasant comments he regularly made...& let's not forget the time's I was glassed/jumped/almost arrested & generally humiliated for his amusement...thanks for the last few year's Mr.
Needless to say I've steered clear of relationships since, I've met some nice guy's over the past year or so who I'm sure had genuinely good intentions towards me but I've always pushed them away, it's only been very recently that I've even contemplated the whole "dating" thing...& to be honest I'm terrified at the thought!...I met a guy who I kinda like...ok I like, I've known him for a little while now so thought..."just be honest"...so I was *argh* I'm so not sure if it was the right thing to do see he's just got out of a relationship, but they'd been on/off for a while, so if it's another of those situations & they get back together I'll feel a tad stupid...oh well it's done now *gulp*
So anyway that's my lot for tonight...please excuse all grammatical errors...I'm more of a talker than a writer :p
Snow Patrol – Chocolate
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
Posts
